Cavs RIP

Okay Mr. Scott, you've gotta make some changes with these guys.

LeBron came back to town and your guys just rolled over and let him do whatever he wanted. He was fouled for real what, once? Come on! Win or lose, three players should've fouled out of this game from on your team. Bosh should've been dragging LeBron off the court by the time this game was over. You're telling me you couldn't have Ryan Hollins crack LeBron in the jaw with a forearm a couple times? You couldn't send Samardo Samuels out there to do the same 6 times?

Instead, all of the Cavs players were fighting over who gets to hug LeBron first?!

WHAT THE F*CK!??!!!?

Half the game, Gibson is talking to LeBron and they're laughing it up. Supposedly this was about friendly competition but I don't care. Byron Scott should've told LeBron to get the F away from his bench.

In July, LeBron told every one of these guys, "You all suck, I can't win anything here, I'm going to team up with Dwyane Wade." And now they're all running up to him giving him hugs, stealing his headband, doing stupid shit.

Jamario Moon should've low-blowed him one of the times he was driving the lane. JJ Hickson should've thrown him to the floor with an illegal screen. Instead, they all fought each other over who was going to get to suck him off first.

Had LeBron gone to the sideline completely rattled and distraught and had some Cavs gone to the locker room having fouled out, win or lose Cleveland would've been happier.

The Cavs just got embarrassed on one of their only Nationally televised games this season. And they didn't care. Now, a few days later, and they're getting blown out by the Detroit Pistons.

They've gotta win back a lot of fans after this disaster.

LeBron

We're not going to boo the Miami Heat because we fear them. We're going to boo you for being an egomaniac, piece of shit who took the easy way out. Go Cavs.

Cavs / Browns

Is Ramon Sessions any good? If so, he's our new point guard and Mo Williams is playing Shooting Guard. Delonte's gone, which is a shame, but only because I was looking forward to some "Gloria! Gloria!" chants from the crowd. Apparently Sessions and Williams played together on the Bucks and became friends, so that's always good.

We also sent Sebastian Telfair to the Timberwolves and got back some really really tall guy. But I think he's just really tall - no clue if he's any good.

So as of this second, we're going into the season with this lineup:

Sessions/Gibson
Williams/Eyenga/Green
Nobody/Eyenga/Moon
Hickson/Jamison
Varejao/Tall Guy From TWolves

I really hope Eyenga is good. He has some killer highlight reels out there, and wasn't bad in the Summer League. Enough about the Cavs, let's get some simple Browns news going.

We signed Hardesty.. Four years. I don't think I've ever seen this guy in a game before, but he should have no problem impressing us as a Browns RB.

We've got McCoy for Four years. Is he our guy of the future? Can't wait to find out. He absolutely kicked ass in Texas and has the best name ever for a QB. Sounds like an action hero. "Colt McCoy" Yes? Well either way, hopefully he sits for a year or two, learns from January Jake, and comes in like Aaron Rodgers.

Jerome Harrison. Hopefully he picks right up where he left off.

Josh Cribbs and Seneca Wallace split in the backfield, no QB. There's a confusing as hell formation waiting to happen.

Massaquoi, Cribbs, Robiskie, Engram, Stucky at WR.. That'll work. No one needs to be double-covered though.. Could be trouble. But if January Jake is on, they'll be fine.

Watson at tight end - I still remember him saving a Pick Six by sprinting downfield and taking out that Cornerback at about the 2 yard line. Watson is a good player like that.

Same O-Line, Same Fullback.. To be honest I'm looking forward to this season. 7-8 wins sounds about right to me.

Cavs

An NBA Proof:

FOX News says that Tom Izzo made the right decision.

Therefore Tom Izzo made the wrong decision.

Cavs vs Celtics V

They had no plan. They all looked tired, they couldn't figure out what to do once the Celtics applied a bit of pressure. They look done. They look like LeBron played his last game at the Q as a Cavalier and just wants out. They look like the Celtics looked for the 2nd half of the season. Now the Celtics look like the best team in the history of the NBA.

Ray Allen has to be shooting around 80-90%. KG has to be shooting about that also. LeBron seemed like maybe he was the answer for Rondo, but with the other guys making every shot they take, who cares who guards Rondo?

I dont even know where the blame is. Is it Mike Brown who continues to pick bizarre rotations? (JJ Hickson coming in to foul, playing Delonte for about 3 minutes total, playing Leon Powe at all). Is it LeBron who missed all of his shots? Is it a lack of caring? Who knows, but I think the blame is on those two. When LeBron plays like crap, there's no one to help him. When he's in his rhythm, the rest of the team is unstoppable.

Then, the really depressing part is, even if through some miracle we beat the Celtics two in a row, then we've got Orlando.... and then if through some really big miracle we beat Orlando, then we've got The Lakers or Suns. F*ck. Actually - the sad part is going to be watching Boston get crushed by Orlando, then watching Orlando get crushed by The Lakers or Suns.. showing that we really had no chance at all.

It's win or go home, Cavs..

Cavs vs Celtics IV

Rondo is too good. We need to put LeBron on him. Shaq needs to deliver some hard fouls to him, sending him crashing to the floor. No one else can seem to guard Rondo. Let LeBron try it.

Other than that, it was a competitive game, we just missed a couple too many shots. The series is now a best of three.. We can't seem to win two games in a row, but we also don't seem to lose two games in a row... They should have a plan to bounce back on Tuesday night. Hopefully.

Cavs vs Celtics III

Well, now that's more like it. So if they just play like that every night, no team in the league can stop them. Boston never even stood a chance in this game. I don't even have anything to write about - they just kicked ass in every possible way.

Cavs vs Celtics II

Well, wtf happened there? Quite the step back.. However - it really was just a lot of missed shots. Shaq has to figure out how to hit the 3 footer. I don't understand how some nights he can hit it every time and how some nights he's not even close? Antawn stopped taking his crazy shots and LeBron was looking for the pass too many times when the teammate was expecting him to take the shot himself. If LeBron's elbow is killing him, he's gotta give some of his minutes to Hickson or someone. Mo, Delonte, Hickson, Jamison, and Shaq should be able to get them through some minutes if his elbow has him limited to the point where all he can do is dribble and pass to the nearest guy. Then if the rest of the team is playing lazy and not stepping up, we're screwed. We've got the best player in the league and his elbow is killing him at the worst possible time. Cavs - step up, help him out.

Another thing to note - the referees were NOT calling reach in fouls all game. Celtics realized this early and caused countless turnovers. If you smack the guy's forearm and the ball comes loose, that's a reach in foul. Not in game 2, and it took the Cavs into the fourth quarter to realize this. Maybe Dick Bavetta is just OLD AS F*CK and can't see what's going on anymore. I got excited when LeBron smacked Pierce's arm and knocked the ball loose in the fourth quarter and got a fast break... but it was too late since Boston had been doing that all game.

Also - even funnier...

http://espn.go.com/blog/truehoop/post/_/id/11341/tim-donaghys-tale-of-dick-bavetta

Tim Donaghy, Referee/Gambler, tells the story of how Dick Bavetta changes how he calls a game as to not allow many blowouts...... Oh, so that's what happened last night. Got it. How is this not painfully obvious to anyone in the NBA? You've got Donaghy blowing the whistle on the shitty officiating, and the shitty officiating CONTINUES, EVEN AFTER HE POINTS IT OUT???? Anyways, whatever. Game 3. Hopefully LeBron can keep resting the elbow and the rest of the team can step up. We need everybody. If Shaq's missing his shots stop giving him the ball, let him just clear a lane.. If Mo can't handle the ball, let Delonte do it.. If LeBron can't play, give Hickson more minutes.. Let Antawn take more shots.. Something.. Anything.

Cavs vs Celtics

Now those are the Celtics I know... In a crunch moment, NOT fouling Shaq.. allowing Mo Williams to DUNK.. Not fouling while down by about 7 with 40 some seconds to go.. The Celtics quit on this game, or Doc Rivers is the worst coach in the NBA.

How do you not foul?!? How do you not send the worst free throw shooting team to the foul line in the last few seconds? Even if we make the free throws, Ray Allen can still hit the 3s to counter? Boston could've easily won that game, but instead they quit.

Those are the Celtics I know from this past season.

Hopefully Shaq keeps providing a brick wall for Rondo to crash and burn into and LeBron's elbow stays fixed... It's the Celtics, so I dont even have a prediction on this series because stupid things always happen with Boston involved...but if this game is any indication, Celtics will quit for good around game three.

Cavs vs Celtics

Cavs in 7.

Too much stupid crap happens when the Celtics are involved. For the months leading to the playoffs, the Celtics phoned it in. 14-11 in the two months before the playoffs. Looking completely like they just wanted their season to be over.

Celtics beat Miami in five, each game by 9, 29, 2, and 10. 50 points total.

Cleveland beat Chicago in five, each game by 13, 10, 23, and 2. 48 points total.

That's about as close of a series as we could have gotten, yes?

But.. when Boston lost, it was by 9. When Cleveland lost, it was by 2.

So if we factor that in.. Boston won by 41 points.. Cleveland won by 46 points.

This has accomplished nothing other than finding out a new way of saying Boston sucks and Cleveland is awesome.


Also LeBron says he isn't worried about his elbow. That's good news, right?


Right?

Cavs go up 2-0. Other Playoff Ramblings..

LeBron after the game told the reporter that the most important thing now is Game 3 against The Bulls. I get the feeling that last year, at no point did they say "Alright, the most important thing right now is Game 1 against The Magic." They were saying "We've got this locked up, bring on L.A." Resulting in too much of this:



Last year in the first two rounds the Cavs were not tested whatsoever. Hopefully the Bulls and the Celtics/Heat put up a fight for us to keep us on our toes. And this time around we should be more than prepared for the Magic. And if it's not the Magic, it will either be the Hawks, the Bucks, or the Grizzles. Mike Brown better not overlook ANY of those teams. The Bucks have Darnell Jackson - they could know our entire playbook by now.

Actually, I bet every team in the NBA knows our playbook.

Play #1: Wing Pick LeBron Option/Dunk - LeBron stands at the top of the key dribbling. Shaq takes up a body under the hoop. Delonte and Mo pop out to opposite wings. Varejao sets a screen. LeBron drives and 1) Dunks on some poor bastard. 2) Dunks on some poor bastard and draws a foul. 3) Is held and draws a foul. 4) Kicks it out to either Delonte or Mo for an open three. 5) Shoots his own long jumper or three. 6) Fires it to "Out of Control" Varejao for a layup/crash into photographers.

Play #2: Mo Running Decoy Option - LeBron outside, waiting for a 3. Mo dribbles and runs in a giant circle under the hoop and back out. Pass to whoever is open for a jumper.

Play #3: Play #2, but substitute Delonte for Mo.

Play #4: That LeBron/Varejao/LeBron/Varejao pass that almost always results in Varejao getting a layup.

There's a play that lets Antawn hit that floater he always makes. There's that new play where they kick it out to Moon for an open three. There's the play where Parker hits the open three. And really that's about it. They just run Play #1 75 times per game and it usually works since LeBron isn't human.


This is alright, because the Magic only have one play:

Play #1: Superman Four Pass Option - Howard has the ball, he posts up. He has an option: 1) Get Double Covered, pass to Lee, Lee passes to Rashard, Rashard passes to Nelson, Nelson passes to Turkaloo for an open three. 2) Don't get Double Covered, Dunk on poor bastard and draw a foul.

Play #1 has since been modified, since the disappearance of Turkaloo and Lee. Instead of Lee, there is now Vince Carter, who modifies the play for himself, and instead of just continuing the pass, he dribbles around and bricks a jumper. This makes the pizza guy do this:



And they also lost Turkaloo, who decided it would be a better career move to play for the Toronto Raptors instead of Orlando; and a bunch of midcarders in that Vince Carter trade.. And now the Cavs have players of their own who can just drain open threes all game, so it's looking like they have a better chance.

And also - back to Orlando's Play #1, now that poor bastard that Dwight Howard will be posting up against is Shaq....



But first thing's first. Chicago Bulls - Game 3.

Cleveland Title

I might be the only one in Cleveland that feels this way, but probably not.

I'll be exceptionally happy if the Cavs win the Championship this year; however, I do believe that the celebration will be milder than if the Browns or even Indians won a title first. It will be a huge celebration, and I'll probably be involved. But I just think the history is deeper with the other franchises and it would mean a lot more to the city if one of the other franchises won first.

Now, that being said. I also came to the realization that our situation could be like Boston. Boston is a baseball town, always has been, always will be. (slight Bret Hart reference) Boston won many titles in basketball and a few in football before the Red Sox won the World Series in '04. But the celebration in '04 was much bigger than the Celtics or Patriots had. The Red Sox meant more to the city and their sports psyche than did the other teams.

So even if the Cavs win this year (and I hope they do), the celebration should not take away from the celebration if the Browns or Indians ever win a title in my lifetime.