Transcript of the Heckert-Reid Phonecall

TOM HECKERT: Andy, we're interested in your Quarterback.

ANDY REID: Vick? No way, he's playing out of his mind right now! He looks like the guy who was drafted #1 out of Virginia Tech! No way we're going to trade you anything for him.

TOM HECKERT: Actually, we're talking about the concussed guy on your bench right now who stunk up the joint in week one. We think he's an improvement over Delhomme and Wallace.

ANDY REID: For your own sake, I'm not going to make this trade.

Misc. Football Stats

The Browns have more Touchdowns the rest of the AFC North, but are in last place with no wins. The Browns have 4 touchdowns and are 0-2. The Steelers have 2 touchdowns and are 2-0.

Phil Dawson is 0-2 so far on field goals, but made all four extra points.

The Colts are in Last Place in the AFC South.

The Chiefs are in First Place in the AFC West.

Kansas City is farther South than Indianapolis.

The Superbowl Contending Cowboys are 0-2 and have been outperformed by The Browns.

The Superbowl Contending Vikings are 0-2 and have been outperformed by The Browns.

The NFC West is on pace for everyone to finish 6-10. We could finally have a 6-10 team in the playoffs.

New England has seven touchdowns. They're in third place. Miami has three touchdowns. They're in first place.

The Browns are currently calling The Eagles about Kevin Kolb.